A general election will be held in the United Kingdom on 7 May 2015, and traditional polling outlets can’t call the result. Naturally, as I did for the independence referendum, I turned to Grindr.
I asked 1024 Grindr users in and around Edinburgh who they intend to vote for, with mixed results. Here is a representative sample:
STATISTICS:
Of the 1024 Grindr users I questioned, 436 responses were counted. 196 of these users settled on a party. Here are their results:
61.73% (121) SNP
11.73% (23) Labour
9.18% (18) Conservative
7.14% (14) Green
3.57% (7) UKIP
3.57% (7) Liberal Democrat
1.53% (3) Monster Raving Loony
1.02% (2) BNP
0.51% (1) Socialist
(Of those polled above, 11 unprompted second preferences were also shared – 7 Green, and 1 apiece for the Conservatives, UKIP, SNP, and Socialists.)
A further 240 users did not settle on a party, and I’ve divided their responses as follows:
38 No intention of voting
34 Answered to tell me they’re not going to answer
33 General evasion
32 Undecided
18 Too horny to engage politically
16 Not eligible to vote
15 Bewilderment
13 Indifference
12 Incomprehensible
11 Rage/aggression
10 Obvious joke answers (“Taliban”, “Meryl Streep”, “UKIP” etc)
7 “Anyone but…” (These users made 3 mentions of the SNP, 2 Conservative, 2 Labour, 2 UKIP, 1 Green, and 1 left wing parties in general)
1 Turned out to be a spare account of someone I’d already polled
(This leaves 122 users who presumably blocked me by the time the results were counted. The minority of these users who actually responded before blocking me could not be counted in these results – “Rage/aggression” would certainly be higher otherwise.)
In conclusion, despite their resistance to independence, Grindr users will vote overwhelmingly in favour of the Scottish National Party. Given that my referendum poll was reported by many as having predicted the outcome, we can conclude from this that the SNP will form a comfortable majority government in Westminster with 62% of the United Kingdom’s vote. This prediction can’t possibly fail.