Scottish Grindr users on the 2017 general election

UK prime minister Theresa May has called a snap election, to be held on 8 June 2017.

I’ve previously polled Grindr users on Scottish independence, Brexit, the 2016 US election, and the previous UK election, in Wales and in Scotland. Just as I did in 2015, I asked 1024 Grindr users in Scotland, mostly in and around Edinburgh, who they’re supporting.

The following is a sample of the replies.

(Identifiable faces in profile pictures have been censored.)

Me: Good afternoon, fist me. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
fistme: Snp of course
Me: Good morning, Lycra lout. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Lycra lout: Morning
Lycra lout: Labour
Me: Good morning, lick them. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
lick them: Tory
Me: Good morning, any1got420. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
any1got420: Green party lol
Me: Good afternoon, Wnk fun at urs. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Wnk fun at urs: Fuck off
Me: Good evening, Andrew. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Andrew: Oh it's you again :P
Andrew: Hello, reddit
Andrew: [a photo of Nicola Sturgeon wearing boxing gloves]
Me: Good morning, twink on twink!. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
twink on twink!: I support twink foam parties 👅
Me: Good morning, Grindr user. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Grindr user: Party? Labour. I've never seen such an appealing manifesto in my lifetime. But I'll be voting to re-elect my SNP MP, Tommy Sheppard. He's done a great job at Westminster and I really like him as a human. Also I still believe in an independent Scotland.
Me: Good morning, Bottom 4 Top. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Bottom 4 Top: The party that's going to arrange for cock to fuck me
Me: Good evening, Hello😉. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Hello😉: SNP
Hello😉: I think on a national basis they fight for our interests in house of commons more than the rest
Hello😉: And it would stuff the others as all they bang on about is independence. Think Nicola is far better than ruth who to me is a lacky for may
Willie is delusional and kesia is on speed and speaks more words per minute than anyone ive ever listened to
Me: Good evening, Je suis bottom. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Je suis bottom: That is none of your business and this is not s political forum so inappropriate on many levels.
Me: Good morning, ⬇ like older?. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
⬇ like older?: Well when I moved to where I live in soon realised that people at an election are actually voting for the local MP. I  found here we had an outstanding one who was very active on behalf of constituents. He was a Libdem, not a party I had ever voted for. At the last election, he lost out to an SNP candidate who shortly was suspended from the party, as a result we had an MP of no party. Not a good
⬇ like older?: Seems there is a limit to the size of a message
Me: To clarify, are you supporting the Lib Dem candidate?
⬇ like older?: Yes because I recently met her but made it clear that I had no time for Tim Fallon and his publicity seeking utterances.
Are you polling on here??
Me: Good morning, In The Zone ↕. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
In The Zone ↕: The S Club Party
Me: Are they on the ballot, In The Zone ↕?
In The Zone ↕: Yeah. N if theyr no then they bloody well should be
Me: Good afternoon, message me. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
message me: Hi im unsure as I've never really kept up with the political scene here it definitely won't be Jeremy Corbyn
Me: Is there any particular non-Corbyn candidate you feel drawn towards?
message me: I dont know any other candidates but what's key for me is the views on Israel and their Stance on foreign policy
message me: H8
message me: H8
message me: Hi
message me: My fingers are too big xd
Me: Good afternoon, Tps4TwnkBttm. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Tps4TwnkBttm: The cock fun party 😀
Tps4TwnkBttm: Certainly not Tory or UKIP.
Me: Good evening, Need to suck. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Need to suck: lol won't be SNP
Me: Do you have any particular non-SNP party in mind, Need to suck?
Need to suck: I think it needs to be conservative they are the only ones fit enough to even try and move us forward tbh
Me: Thank you for your input, Need to suck.
Need to suck: Where r u ?
Need to suck: And u got a nice for me to suck dry ?
Me: Good evening, Ass for hung. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Ass for hung: The monster cock party
Me: Are they on the ballot, Ass for hung?
Ass for hung: They like tio knock on the back door when canvassing
Me: Good morning, horny now. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
horny now: None a don't care so don't ask me
Me: Thank you anyway, horny now.
horny now: Yes
Me: Good morning, i like peenis. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
i like peenis: The House Party
Me: Are they on the ballot, i like peenis?
i like peenis: I believe they are. They lost their deposit at the last election (or is that 'erection')
Me: Thank you for your input, i like peenis.
i like peenis: Talking of input.....
Me: Good afternoon, Just do it. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Just do it: I support the, no borders/ humanism idealists
Just do it: I mean standing up for humanity
Me: Does this refer to any party in particular?
Just do it: Seems socialism but not,!
All human specious have rights to live a better life. Anywhere I n the world.this is
I believe in
Me: Good morning, Horny Guy. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Horny Guy: Ruth davison.......if i could get a gun i would shoot the snp
Me: Good evening, near you. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
near you: Libdem so that they can cancel brexit
near you: Bar that, labor.
Me: Thank you for your input, near you.
near you: Cool.
near you: What else kind of 'input' are you looking for at this late hour
Me: Good evening, Messy rimmer💩. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Messy rimmer💩: The brown party.... Failing that, the greens 🙂
Me: Good morning, 420 Cat man 😇. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
420 Cat man 😇: I'd have been less offended if you asked for my dick size...
Me: Would you like me to ask for your dick size, 420 Cat man 😇?
420 Cat man 😇: No
Me: Good afternoon, SLOW N DEEP.. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
SLOW N DEEP.: Ur party
SLOW N DEEP.: [a photo of his dick]
SLOW N DEEP.: I wanna support it with that
Me: Good morning, Str8 acting. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Str8 acting: Why don't you tell me who you are supporting first
Str8 acting: Guess not, unimpressive
Me: I am undecided for the time being, Str8 acting.
Str8 acting: If you have a problem with me , say it, don't be such a bitchy queen about it
Me: Do you have an answer, Str8 acting?
Str8 acting: Why does it bother you so much, you that fragile
Me: I am an inquisitive soul, Str8 acting.
Str8 acting: Well you are clearly unattractive so unless you actually have a legitimate question, I've wasted enough time on you
Me: Good afternoon, Red Earl. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Red Earl: UKIP
Me: Thank you for your input, Red Earl.
Red Earl: As if! SNP
Me: Sorry, you're locked in for UKIP now, #1 Paul Nuttall fan Red Earl.
Red Earl: No random profile locks me in! I'm more stable and strong than that. But if Paul Nuttal wanted to shag me I would hesitate to say no
Me: Good evening, Sucker. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Sucker: I'll be supporting the SNP - how about you?
Me: Undecided, but quite possibly the same.
Me: Thank you for your input, Sucker.
Sucker: I'm much better at sucking cock than political analysis though
Me: Good evening, Stephen ↕. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Stephen ↕: I'm supporting Labour. In 2014 myself and a lot of other Yes socialists swore to old Labour voters that we'd welcome a socialist Labour Party. I thought we were telling the truth. But when Corbyn came along he was somehow framed our enemy. Corbyn apparently 'didn't understand Scotland' and we all fell in line behind the SNP.
Stephen ↕: But the truth is a Corbyn-led UK Government is a much worse scenario for the British ruling class than an SNP-led independent Scotland.
Me: Good evening, Likemuscle. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Likemuscle: Conservatively speaking, I'm labouring to make up my mind. I'm usually quite liberal in my views and green with envy for anyone who has fixed opinions. Even being only half Scottish and not at all nationalist it's probably maybe definitely unlikely to be UKIP. That being said I've already voted by post but don't like to say.
I hope you probably definitely don't mind if I don't say.
likemuscle: BTW, are you muscled?
Me: Good evening, Summer 4:20. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Summer 4:20: woulddnt discuss religion or politics with me, i got more extreme views than hitler
Me: What views are those, Summer 4:20?
Summer 4:20: white supremacy
Summer 4:20: cba typing so that sums it up i guess :P
Summer 4:20: not racist - just feel when theres more of them than us its a matter of national security
Me: Good evening, SuckYouNow!. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
SuckYouNow!: Please go away and leave me alone. You pop up at every election. Where on my profile does it say I want to take part in a poll. So go fuck off and annoy someone else.

 

STATISTICS:

Of the 1024 Grindr users I questioned, 395 responses were counted. 165 of these users settled on a party. Here are their results:

52.7% (87)   SNP
25.5% (42)   Labour
10.9% (18)   Conservative
4.8% (8)       Green
3.6% (6)       Liberal Democrat
1.8% (3)       Monster Raving Loony
0.6% (1)       Communist

Three parties who received votes in the equivalent poll in 2015 – Socialist, BNP, and, most notably, UKIP (who were tied with the Liberal Democrats) – received no (non-sarcastic) votes in 2017.

Here are the changes since that poll:

SNP: DOWN 11%
Labour: UP 14.8%
Conservative: UP 1.7%
Green: DOWN 2.3%
Liberal Democrat: no change
Monster Raving Loony: UP 0.3%
Communist: UP 0.6% (no votes in 2015)
UKIP: DOWN 3.8% (no votes in 2017)
BNP: DOWN 1% (no votes in 2017)
Socialist: DOWN 0.5% (no votes in 2017)

A further 230 users responded, but did not settle on a party.

42 were undecided, and could not be swayed to pick a favourite.

31 said they would choose not to vote.

11 were not eligible to vote.

Other responses can be roughly categorised as follows:

51   Explicitly declined to answer
44   Miscellaneous evasion
19   Comedy answers (”monster cock party”, ”bukkake party”, “UKIP” etc)
13   Too horny to engage politically (inc. 3 who just sent nudes)
11   Incomprehensible
8     Just replying “hi” or “hello” or something, ignoring the opening question, and proceeding to attempt a conversation like it was never asked

In addition, here is a count of secondary positive mentions of parties – second choices for those who are voting for a different party, or parties mentioned as possibilities for those who remain undecided:

19   Labour
12   Green
10   SNP
4     Lib Dem
1     Liberal
1     Conservative

These are parties that were singled out for negative mentions, often preceded by an “Anything but”:

16   Conservative
8     SNP
3     Labour
2     UKIP
1     Green

In conclusion, the SNP wane slightly but remain comfortably dominant, while Labour pulls far ahead of the Tories as the opposition. Also, for the first time since 2015, I’ve been able to complete a poll without getting banned from Grindr. I am confident this will be remembered as one of the most politically significant turnarounds of 2017.

(See also: the Grindr election poll in England.)

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