On 12 December 2019, the United Kingdom will elect its 58th Parliament. I’ve previously polled Grindr users on the 2017 election, in Scotland and England, and the 2015 election, in Scotland and Wales, as well as on Scottish independence, Brexit, this year’s European election, and the 2016 US election. This time, I asked 619 Grindr users across the Central Belt of Scotland, in and around Edinburgh and Glasgow, who theyβre supporting in this yearβs general election.
The following is a sample of the replies.
(Identifiable faces in profile pictures have been censored.)
![Me: Good morning, Sugar Daddy. Which party are you supporting in the forthcoming general election?
Sugar Daddy: Why you wanting to know that
Me: This is the only thing that gets me off, Sugar Daddy.
Sugar Daddy: Let's see your horny pics then son
Me: [a picture of Jeremy Corbyn]
Me: [a picture of Diane Abbott]
Me: [a picture of John McDonnell]
Me: [a picture of Emily Thornberry]](https://www.machotrouts.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/32-IMG_0374-5.png)
STATISTICS:
Of the 621 users I managed to question before I was banned from Grindr, 215 responses were counted. 96 of these users settled on a party or candidate. Here are their results:
| 52.1% (50) | Scottish National Party (SNP) |
| 21.9% (21) | Labour Party |
| 8.3% (8) | Conservative and Unionist Party |
| 7.3% (7) | Monster Raving Loony Party |
| 6.3% (6) | Green Party |
| 1.0% (1) | Liberal Democrats |
| 1.0% (1) | Democratic Unionist Party |
| 1.0% (1) | Sinn FΓ©in |
| 1.0% (1) | Citizens for Undead Rights and Equality |
(Nobody expressed support for the Brexit Party or UKIP.)
Here are the swings in support since my 2017 poll of Scottish Grindr users:
SNP: DOWN 0.6%
Labour: DOWN 3.6%
Conservative: DOWN 2.6%
Monster Raving Loony: UP 5.5%
Green: UP 1.6%
Lib Dem: DOWN 2.6%
DUP: UP 1% (no votes in 2017)
Sinn FΓ©in: UP 1% (no votes in 2017)
CURE: UP 1% (no votes in 2017)
Communist: DOWN 0.6% (no votes in 2019)
A further 119 users responded, but did not settle on a party.
23 wereΒ undecided, and could not be swayed to pick a favourite.
Some voters who were undecided, or unwilling to express support for one specific party over the others, still gave some indication of their preferences:
| 3 | Anything but Conservative |
| 2 | SNP or Labour |
| 2 | SNP or Lib Dem |
| 1 | SNP or Green |
| 1 | Anything but SNP |
In any case where a Grindr user was undecided on their final vote, but still able to pick a favourite party, they were counted towards that partyβs tally. However, I also took note of any second preferences they volunteered.
- 3 SNP supporters are also considering voting Labour.
- 2 SNP supporters are also considering voting Green.
- 1 SNP supporter is also considering voting Lib Dem.
- 1 Labour supporter is also considering voting SNP.
14 polledΒ do not support any party, or stated that they were not going to vote.
14 polled are not eligible to vote. Of those who gave reasons, 11 are not British residents, and 1 trans user is unable to vote due to complications of applying for a name change.
Other responses can be roughly categorised as follows:
| 12 | Explicitly declined to answer |
| 11 | Miscellaneous evasion |
| 9 | Cryptic or incomprehensible |
| 9 | General bewilderment |
| 9 | Too horny to engage politically |
| 7 | Comedy answers ("S Club", "SuBo", "the assparty" etc.) |
| 5 | Lack of interest |
| 3 | Just laughed at me |
| 3 | Just replied βhiβ or βhelloβ or something, ignoring the opening question, and proceeded to attempt a conversation like it was never asked |
This is about as illuminating as any other poll you’ll read this month. Vote out the Tories on Thursday, and I’ll thank you for your input.